Gazal Dhaliwal
Birthplace:
Patiala, Punjab
Residence:
Patiala, Punjab
Qualifications:
B.E. in Chemical Engineering and Diploma in Filmmaking
BREAKING THE BARRIERS OF STEREOTYPES
She’s a big name in Bollywood. She has a degree in Chemical Engineering. And she’s been endowed with an extremely strong personality that has always stood her in good stead in the most challenging, and often mentally exhausting, circumstances. Come what may, she was never the one to shy away from working hard and staying steadfast towards her goal. She’s a true icon, a trendsetter.
She’s made a big name for herself in Bollywood. A screenwriter, she’s known for writing the screenplay and dialogues for Vinod Chopra’s Ek Ladki Ko Dekha Toh Aisa Laga, among other movies. She started with dialogue writing for Wazir (2016) and Lipstick Under My Burkha (2016) and moved onto writing screenplay for movies like Qarib Qarib Single. She has also written a web series, Mismatched (Netflix).
While there’s no doubt about her immense talent, she may have just kicked off an incredible journey. Born in a conservative family in Patiala, she always aimed high.
Her films are known for making strong statements for women’s empowerment and acceptance of LGBTQ community, while raising the pitch against sexism.
In the process of writing the dialogues for the critically acclaimed film Lipstick, she felt a sense of connection with the pivotal characters – all females – of the film. “The reason I felt connected was because they too feel suffocated under the patriarchal rules. I have felt the same for 25 years because I was a woman stuck in the body of a man,” she says.
The beginning of a new realisation
Born in 1982 as Gunraj, a boy, in the historically rich Patiala, Gazal always felt she did not belong in the body she was born in. From the young age of five, she loved dressing up in her mother’s dupatta and sarees, and had more in common with girls her age than boys.
Her friend circle too comprised mostly girls, with whom she loved to play in the house. One day, her aunt found her dressing up in her mother’s clothes and slapped her. At that moment, Gazal realised something was amiss, something very different in the way she felt. “The gender of my soul did not match with the gender of my God-given body,” she says as she reflects on those days.
As she grew older, she found her innate nature to be more feminine than masculine. She attended one of the best schools in the city but constantly felt trapped and overwhelmed. This feeling was distracting her from her studies and she gradually became withdrawn and isolated.
During her teenage years, many of her schoolmates were mean to her, often making fun of her. “I was called a hijra, a eunuch. I used to control my natural behaviour; it made me irritable. I was in constant fear of exposing myself to others and dreaded being made fun of. Irritable, scared, confused, yes, I was all of that!”
When she came out at 17
Not willing to live like this any longer, she finally came out and confided to her father at the age of 17. However, unable to grasp the seriousness of the issue, her father thought it was just another teenage phase that she would eventually grow out of.
“As a confused child, I thought I didn’t have their support, but still wanted to break out of the confusion,” she recalls.
Amid all this, she took a drastic decision – to run away from home. She stole some money and left home for Delhi. “I was on the train – lost in myself – with a range of inexplicable emotions. I felt scared, vulnerable, and extremely exposed as if everyone was pointing at me.”
All that she had faced until then made her feel more miserable about her situation. Fortunately, she realised her mistake and decided to go back home to her parents and confess to them.
Going back home proved to be an extremely happy decision as it was after this that she got the unvacillating support of her parents. “See how parental support changes a child – their support changed it all for me. I knew I could not waste my life and that I had to do something worthwhile,” she admits.
Children find all their courage from their parents; if the parents deny it to them, they move in a direction that they shouldn’t, she explains.
The leap of faith
Gazal studied chemical engineering for graduation from Malviya National Institute of Technology, Jaipur, and started working at Infosys (Mysore). However, her heart lay somewhere else – in filmmaking.
Hoping to undergo Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS), she researched about it but realised it was a far-fetched dream. So, she moved to accomplish her professional aspirations instead and took a leap of faith – to be a part of Bollywood.
She left her job to pursue a filmmaking diploma from Xavier Institute of Communications, Mumbai, during which she had to make a documentary. She chose to make one on the transgender community and the people who had undergone SRS. “Meeting them made me realise that I too could get it done, I too could live like I had wanted to,” she says.
She showed her parents the documentary she had made and then sought their approval for undergoing SRS. To her delight, their response was overwhelming – “when are you planning to?” is all that they asked.
“My SRS probably worked in my favour – it kind of helped me live my professional dreams,” she says. Freed of the “cage” and into a new body now, she didn’t feel “excited or enthusiastic but rather peaceful and silent. It was my Eureka moment.”
Moving to Mumbai
Gazal moved to Mumbai in 2009 and began to hustle and strive for her dream. She debuted with dialogue writing for the superhit Wazir, when she got to work with superstars Amitabh Bachhan and Farhan Akhtar. Then, her moment of pride, Lipstick…, a controversial black comedy, won much acclaim and went on to become a huge hit bringing her immense recognition.
“The greatest appreciation for Lipstick was when my father and his tennis association members watched the film and gave positive reviews.”
There was no looking back for her after that.
“Qarib Qarib Single was like my baby, my favourite child and very close to my heart,” she reveals.
Gazal is now a well-respected name in the film industry who has not let her identity as a transwoman overshadow her achievements. She works to spread awareness of the rights of the transgender community and helps enable them to reach their potential.
VISION FOR THE TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY
Now that NALSA judgements have been passed and policies changed, Gazal says it’s high time that the community starts proving itself without the help of the word ‘trans’. “I know how important it is to make a successful transwoman visible in this industry, to this industry and the society; yet I would rather be known for my work and not my gender. When I write a story or dialogues, I don’t want to be identified by my gender. Do words, stories have a gender?” she wonders. “The community needs to be recognised as ‘people’ and not ‘trans’ to be accepted as one among the society – that is where respect will come from. And why not? There are so many so well qualified, some with exemplary success stories. It is important to get the right representation in society,” she asserts.
MESSAGE FOR THE MAINSTREAM SOCIETY
“Our community does not have enough representation for us. When I was young and isolated, I was a bundle of negative energies – suffocated, trapped, confused, irritable – because I had no outlet, no one to understand me, rather they mocked me. Thankfully, my parents supported me but most of the transgender kids aren’t as lucky.” She wants familiarisation with concepts of gender identity to begin at school. It is a common misconception, especially in our country, that only homosexuals undergo SRS – these are to be broken to break the stereotypes, she says. “The government has started its efforts, and some people have very gradually come to accept us. But there’s still a lot the government can do to spread awareness – we all have come to believe a lot of talent remains hidden in rural India, where departments have now begun reaching. Likewise, it is rural India where a lot of trans-people are – caged and confused, on their path to death.”
FIVE FACTS ABOUT GAZAL
She sings extremely well.
She loves cycling to connect with her surroundings. She cycles over 30km every day to work.
Her hobbies are dancing and travelling.
She loves to wear red, black and yellow dresses.
She loves to eat pizzas, chocolates and ice cream.
