Nayana Udupi
Birthplace:
Udupi, Karnataka
Residence:
Bengaluru, Karnataka
Qualification:
Class 12 and Diploma in computers
Inspiration:
Her mother, Susheela
BREAKING THE GLASS CEILING
A leading IT MNC, ThoughtWorks India, finds her resourceful and influential marketing associate. She is convinced that given a chance, the transgender community can prove themselves in every field. Someone who describes herself as a humane human, she has done yeoman’s service for the community and beyond.
Coming from a small conservative town, it’s quite an achievement for someone to climb the ladder of success in the corporate world. And when a transwoman ekes out that success, it’s almost like breaking a glass ceiling. Yes, that’s what Nayana Udupi has accomplished – establishing herself as quite a trendsetter.
Today she enjoys a seemingly comfortable social position – a far better situation than others like her face – but the journey has been far from smooth; it has had more of its share of pain and loneliness.
Nayana, born a boy on 28 January 1975 in Udupi, Karnataka, to Susheela and Rama Sherigar, recalls her grandmother expressing her love for all things ‘girly’. Tracing her childhood, she says, “My father had prayed to Goddess Durga for a male child, answering which the Goddess sent me – a boy who’d wear his sister’s clothes and follow his mother everywhere. Imagine how he’d flare up watching his son doing all girly things. I laugh it off now, but it was difficult to understand his anger back in the day.”
Her father, depressed about his child’s feminine mannerisms, would regularly ridicule her about it. Her mother, educated but old-fashioned, did whatever her husband told her to, but would always protect her child.
“Despite what my mother was doing for me, I used to get beaten up for no reason or reasons I couldn’t fathom. It was simply my mother’s support that I managed to finish my studies,” she avers.
Yes, she did finish her studies but away from home.
Difficult decision
Her father considered Nayana a disgrace and she was not allowed to join the family business. Call it his anger, frustration, or his efforts to make her a ‘normal’ being, he sent her away to Kolar Gold Fields Foreman training – a place where the strongest of men were needed. She terms her time there as a confusing period; for a feminine 15-year-old child, it was rather traumatic.
Meanwhile, the realisation was dawning on her that it would be difficult to survive with her father, so she made a decision – she unwittingly ran away to Bengaluru (then Bangalore). Her friends helped her find a job there as a hotel receptionist – she would spend her days studying for PUC and nights working.
“I was very timid those days. I knew nothing about the hijra community or the fact that feminine men like me joined the community in cities like Mumbai, Delhi, and Pune. I also lacked knowledge about sex reassignment.”
At this point in her life, she decided to move to Pune. However, Pune wouldn’t welcome her with an open heart.
She nurtured a strong desire to live the life of a girl. “I was convinced I was born in the wrong body and I had to zip it out.” In her quest for gender transition, she joined the hijra community through some like-minded people.
“I wonder how and why some elderly people there knew about me; they came forward and said, ‘Child, be where you are. Life’s extremely tough here.’”
She fell into the trap – of begging and sex work. This required Nayana to adjust to a life she had never thought of. “You have to be internally very strong to be a sex worker. Anti-socials, you know, are generally shooed off. All of it needed me to be on the roads – the sun shines bright or it rains.
“The abusive language and the rough and tough attitude didn’t quite sit with me. It was simply not me. Here I was, an educated person, yet doing what not even the uneducated deem right. Though it was all for survival, I felt ashamed doing it. All I wanted was to live like a normal girl – study and work in an office.”
So, a few years later, having saved money and transitioned into a woman, life turned a full circle for Nayana. She was back in Bengaluru, picking up the threads once again.
She set herself up on the path she wanted – to educate herself. She had always wanted to be a woman and work among them. She wanted to be known as a woman and not a eunuch.
She joined a basic computer course and later did an advanced diploma in Multimedia, in between earning for herself. She sat for many interviews to no avail, but freelance work came her way. That too, however, did not last long as her transgender identity came in the way. Fortunately, she found support from her family, especially her mother.
Things started getting tougher. She tried her hand at movies as an extra – someone told her she could earn a living there but that too wasn’t fruitful. Whatever little savings she had were eroding.
She hated sex work and the stereotyping of the community. “That’s when I thought I would have to achieve something of my own, create my own identity, and let them know.”
Coming out
That’s when Nayana opened up about her gender in a media interview. From there she was directed to Sangama, an NGO that works to secure the rights of sexual minorities, especially those from non-English speaking backgrounds.
She oversaw their administrative work as an administration manager for four years. “I worked for two years and then the Pehchan project came my way and I was promoted to a manager. It was satisfying to an extent but I was looking for a job with IT companies even if it was a data entry operator’s job.”
She then came into contact with Subhu Chako, her boss’s friend and the founder of the Solidarity Foundation which worked towards the inclusion of the transgender community in the corporate world. That’s when Thoughtworks, a company that believes in diversity and inclusion, gave Nayana a big break.
“I was the first transgender employee with them. They even helped me upgrade my skills but being from a small town, not well-versed in English and among many MBAs, it was tough adjusting,” she admits.
“ThoughtWorks then created a profile in marketing and finance, and she is part of the marketing team taking care of payment and vendor management,” she says.
“Yes, it was tough. There were NGOs but with limited awareness and we faced a lot of harassment albeit things have improved. I had wanted to be an Ayurvedic doctor, an air hostess, or a model. So when I walked the ramp, it was a dream-come-true moment for me. I struggled a lot and faced obstacles, especially from people who pulled me down but I ignored them because I only had one thought in mind – do something worthwhile.”
Through ThoughtWorks she attended the NASSCOM Diversity and Inclusion Summit. Nayana found her place to put forth her views. When she did it, she caught the attention of the corporate world.
“People reached out to me and articles about me were published in various newspapers. I also did a TED talk.”
About the support, Nayana says, “Thanks to my family for sometimes accepting me and sometimes pushing me out. This helped me to choose my path. My mother always tells me, ‘You are my child’ and I’ll always cherish that.”
VISION FOR THE TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY
She hopes to see the transgender community doing well in all walks of the corporate world. We must believe in ourselves, get an education, break the stereotypes, and have the willpower to compete. “Inclusivity in the corporate world and elsewhere will go a long way in getting us respect and acceptance in society, employment, housing facilities, etc.”
MESSAGE FOR THE MAINSTREAM SOCIETY
She firmly believes that the mindset has to change. “Passing laws won’t help if the implantation on the ground isn’t completed. For that, people too have to come forward. The transgender community and society are taking baby steps and things will be achieved gradually. Do not judge people by their looks, attire, body language, etc. Be kind not just to people but to animals too.” She further says, addressing a global concern, “Stop polluting water bodies and strive for sustainable development for the sake of the planet.”
FIVE FACTS ABOUT NAYANA
She loves drawing, painting, gardening, cooking, travelling and feeding stray dogs.
She wants to explore Udupi more, travel across India and visit Africa to see the wildlife.
Her favourite food is prasadam at Udupi Krishna temple.
She keeps abreast of news the world over.
She describes herself as a humane human.
